I can't stop writing!! Look up at the title; creative eh? :)
Most of us have had that one special teacher or professor that has helped us through difficult moments in our lives. They either become that person we look up to, we seek as a mentor, or as guidance. So far in my educational life ( can't think of a good word) I have looked up to 3 different teachers/professors. 2 being from college and 1 from high school.
Because I won't use names; for the sole purpose of privacy I will use "special coded names"
When I was a junior in high school I took a geology class with LMB. This teacher was one of a kind. She was funny, outgoing, smart, and had a little bit of a crazy side to her. Having her as a teacher made me realize that all teachers are human. I honestly don't remember how I connected with her, but what I do remember is that we were both a part of the special needs worlds. I don't want to get to personal, but her son had speech problems (apraxia if my memory serves me right) and my brother has autism. So we connected in such a way that we both knew how hard it is to deal with therapies and so forth and so on. It's quite funny, but I just thought about how we both had/have anxiety issues. Perhaps we connected because of anxiety? She would give me great tips on how to deal with anxiety problems and I just loved her. She was so caring and so thoughtful. She knew that I was having such a hard time with the issue of my autistic brother. And just talking to her about it made me feel really good because I knew that she cared. She even gave me her phone number in case I wanted to talk. However, I never called because I was her student at the time and I didn't know about the legalities of school policy. Either way, it was thoughtful and such a nice gesture. She really did change my life and I looked forward to coming to her class. Before graduating high school, all I knew about her was that she was expecting twins. Months later I saw a slide show of her twins in my childhood class. As I think about it, I wonder where she is at right now. I hope that she is doing well. I wish I could have stayed in contact with her over the years just to see how she is doing. She's probably going crazy with three kids!!
My first year at city college was very difficult. I was in the midst of a terrible economic crisis and spent the summer of 09' living with my aunt in Gilroy because we lost our beautiful home to foreclosure.
(Gosh, how I miss this house; it literally makes me cry. I know I shouldn't cry over a house, but this was our very first family home and to lose it..is soo devastating)
At the time, I was living in Santa Maria, CA (only city known for having Michael Jackson's court hearing) and eventually ended up living one hour down South from SM. The only good thing about moving was obviously moving with my family, but moving away from the nothingness of SM. I don't even know what my father was thinking to initiate the move to SM, regardless I am back in my hometown and nothing will keep me from moving anywhere else. So after living with my aunt for the summer. I started college immediately after graduating in 09.' I was 17 years old and such a brat because I was just immature. I didn't know anything about college. I was just lost and confused. I made my class schedule late and just took a bunch of classes that had no relevance to my major. Heck, I didn't even have a major. I don't even think I knew what a major was. Man, was I an airhead. Regardless, I took 2 criminal justice classes, a math class, and a English class. My professor in my English class was LTM and she was such a kind hearted lady. The cause for our connection started in class. I was talking about my autistic brother and the book "The Alchemist," by Paulo Coelho (great book btw). After class, she pulled me aside and she wanted to know more about my brother and so on and so forth. Apparently, I found out that her daughter has cerebral palsy. And from that conversation we connected. Just like LMB. LTM and I were both involved in the special needs world. She would give me advice and I saw her as my mentor which seems more valid in college. After the fall semester was over. We never really saw each other except around campus, but being that my college campus is enormous it was rare. I always think about her and how her daughter is doing. On a rare occasion, we will catch up briefly. However, I never have time because I'm rushing from one class period to the next. Having LTM as my professor made me realize that I am not alone in the world especially in the special needs world.
Now that the Spring semester is over and I am officially done with school until fall. I can finally relax. Moving on, I really feel that this particular English ( yes, once again another English professor) professor made such an impact on my life that I idolize her. I will call her KAM. When I first walked in my English class, KAM arrived a bit late. She had so much energy and she was very hyped up about wanting to teach. Little did I know that this class was really intense. It was college freshman comp, but I was lacking in comprehension skills which ended up hurting me in the beginning. About three weeks in the semester, I sent KAM an email and told her that I was going to withdraw from her class because I figured I would end up flunking. Immediately, she sent me an email and told me not to drop and that she and TA will help me. I figured, well why drop if the professor is wanting me to stay. She could have easily said okay good luck finding another teacher. But no she wanted to help me. And I am never one to drop a class, but I was so overwhelmed. I figured I couldn't handle it. I met her during her office hours to talk more about the class and whether or not I could pass. We started to get more personal until I told her about my autistic brother. Talking about my brother in person is such a struggle for me because it's like I'm still in mourning. I ended crying in front of KAM!! I felt so embarrassed that i couldn't even face her. I was choked up. She knew she hit a sensitive nerve and she immediately stopped. I can't even believe that my first meeting with this teacher and I end up crying. Like I am such a sap. I am never one to cry. I am strong and to me crying is a weakness especially in a professional setting. However, she was very caring and understanding and from that office hour. We became what I consider friends. I would always email her and she would reply back. We got along really good perhaps even too good. I definitely look up to her. Seriously though, KAM is living my dream. She went to Harvard (so jealous) and obtained her Ph.D from UCLA. Because the class was a hybrid class. We only met once a week, and basically we had to teach ourselves the material as well as do online assignments. However, with her guidance I passed her class with a B which isn't bad for freshman comp. I hope that I can stay in contact with her as the years go by. She inspired me to go for the AA degree in English. And because of her I want to write more and learn more. My writing isn't perfect, but I hope that as I continue to write I will get better.
Anyways, it's about 2:30am and I am going to hit the sack if insomnia lets me.
Goodnight! :)
(Just a quick tip; my blogs are very sparingly going to be edited)
<3 Jackie
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